~*~*~*~*~
Hold My Hand
Two Women.

Two Men.

Two totally different roads to walk.

Both women dealing with the cruel reminders of their pasts, of what selfishness and anger can do. Holding on to what they have left they begin a new journey, attempting to rebuild. Praying someone will forgive them, that just maybe someone will be there to hold their hand.

~*~*~*~*~
He was there when her world fell apart, holding her as she screamed, tears streaming from her eyes as she fought to get free. He sat with her as she slept soothing her cries as she awoke from nightmares of the last two days. It was there secret, because she refused to tell anyone else, she had made him vow to keep quite, to hide the truth from everyone including her own fiancee. He realized as he watched her stare at the wall that their lives had suddenly been intertwined more so than ever before, yet he had no idea why.

"Kay, you need to eat." He begged looking over at her.
"I said I’m not hungry."
"You can’t starve yourself."
"I’m not eating this food, I’m sorry but I don’t like Jello and I’ll never consider Chicken Broth an actual food substance."
"But your mother will be here soon." He said. "And your so pale."
"My mother doesn’t care if I live or die!" Kay growled. "She hates me for what I’ve done to her perfect family."
"Kay you know that isn’t true."
She rolled her eyes as she sat up from her hospital bed to look at him, "I ruined Charity’s life, I am the reason Charity and Miguel are no longer together! Don’t you get it Reese? Mother is Pro-Charity and Anti-Kay."
Reese Durkee frowned, "You can’t do this to yourself Kay."
Kay shook her head. "Why don’t you just leave Reese? I treated you like dirt, used you to get to Miguel, so just leave me alone!"
"Kay I forgave you for that, I understood it."
Kay let out a hostile laugh. "Understood? Reese how can you understand? Your this decent guy that would never hurt anyone, and I’m a horrible person who hurt everyone!"
"Kay please, try not to get upset." Reese said in a calm voice.
"How can I not get upset? My life is over Reese, and its all my fault."
"Kay none of this is your fault."
"I hurt so many people Reese, and now I’ve got to pay for it."
Reese looked at her watching her eyes fill with tears. "No Kay, this has nothing to do with what you did."
"It has everything to do with it. I’m being punished for ruining Charity’s life, I’ve lost everything because of what I did to her."
"Kay, your not being punished."
"I got pregnant by Miguel so I could have him Reese, that is why all of this is happening."
"Kay you can’t blame yourself for the wreck, or loosing the baby, it was raining outside, you couldn’t help it."
Kay felt the warm tears roll down her face. "My baby is gone Reese, the child Miguel and I planned to raise together is gone because of me! Because of what I did, I wrecked and lost my baby, and now I can’t have kids! You heard the doctors Reese, I can never have a child! I did that to myself!" She screamed through her tears.
"This is not your fault! Stop saying that, you did nothing to deserve this kind of pain!"
Kay rolled her eyes. "Like it matters anyway, once Miguel finds out I can no longer have children he’s not going to marry me, and then I’ll have one more thing to deal with."
"Kay." Reese began sitting beside her on the bed. "You have to tell Miguel the truth."
"Why? So he can run back to Charity? No way! I’m just not ready for that yet, besides who says he’s even going to stay with me now? Reese what if he was with be just because of our child? He has no reason to stay now." She frowned.
"All the more reason to be honest Kay, then you’ll know for sure."
She rested her head on her pillow. "No, I just can’t do that yet."
Reese moved from the bed, "I need to go for awhile, I’ll call you tonight." He sighed.
"Whatever." She said turning her head to stare at the wall. "It doesn’t matter what anyone does, its not going to help me."
Reese lowered his head as he walked out of the room almost knocking Miguel down.
"Miguel you okay?" Reese asked. "I didn’t see you there.
"Its nothing Reese." Miguel said looking at his best friend. "How is she?"
"She won’t eat and she just stares at the wall." Reese frowned. "I’m very worried about her."
Miguel dropped his head, "I don’t know what to say to her."
"Just be there Miguel." Reese sighed.
Miguel nodded his head, "Oh I plan to be, I’m not leaving her now Reese."
Reese looked into the eyes of his friend. "So your still going through with the wedding?" He asked slowly.
"Of course I am man, Kay and I might have lost our child, but I’m not going to leave her now, what kind of man would I be if I did that?" He questioned.
"So you love her?" Reese asked running his fingers through his thick hair, watching as Miguel lowered his eyes.
"Kay is one of the most important people in my life." He said walking over to the door, "I better get in there Reese." Miguel smiled. "Thanks for looking after her."
Reese rested against the brick wall once Miguel was inside. "Why wouldn’t I look after her? I’m the one that loves her." He whispered to himself.
~*~*~*~*~*~

She held her child in her arms, looking down at her as she slept. In the tiny one bedroom apartment she had prepared a home for them, a place they could call their own. As she looked at her baby a frown fell on her face, realizing her child would never really call the apartment home. No, her little girl would be raised mostly by her father, and his wife. She was simply ‘Weekend Mom’ as her baby’s grandmother had said with a laugh. "Breanna I won’t let them do this to us." She whispered kissing the child’s forehead as a tear trickled down her face.

"Theresa, did you open the gift I brought over? Chad Harris questioned as he came from the bathroom.
"Not yet, did you find my problem?"
"The sink was stopped up." He laughed, "Its all fixed now though."
"Thank you Chad." She smiled, laying Breanna in her crib.
"Hey it was no trouble at all." He said looking down at the little girl. "She looks like you." He stated with a grin.
"That’s what Mama says."
"Well Pilar is right as usual." Chad told her, "So are you going to open that gift?" He smiled, "I mean I picked it out by myself."
"Chad you bought her plenty when she was born." Theresa said opening the small package.
"Yeah but I got to thinking, babies grow real quick and I heard women at the Book Café talking about how everyone bought their babies little things, and they didn’t have anything once the got up bigger."
Theresa smiled as she pulled out the small burgundy dress." Oh Chad its beautiful."
"Well I know you look good in that color so I figured she would too." He smiled. "And its bigger, she can wear it in a couple months."
"Thank you so much Chad, I love it!" Theresa cooed. "But why did you give it to me? Why not give the present to her father?" She frowned.
"Girl, she’s your daughter too, and I wanted you to have it, not Ethan."
"But she lives with him." Theresa frowned.
"You’re going to get her back, this weekend deal just ain’t right! And I told him so too, I don’t care if you did try to become Mrs. Julian Crane, the child belongs with you."
"The court didn’t think so Chad, they felt Ethan and Gwen would be better suited to raise her. I suppose I should just be glad to have my weekends." She frowned.
"Hey now, Don’t go talking like that, Whit says you’ve got a good lawyer now, you’ve gotta keep believing."
Theresa looked down at her little girl, "Its funny when I was younger, all I wanted was to raise a family with Ethan Crane, I almost got my wish, ya know?" She said glancing up at Chad, "But I messed it all up, still I can’t believe he went for custody of my child, its so unlike him."
"He told me you were too immature to raise a baby, that he didn’t want his little girl to grow up with a liar."
"But he wants her to grow up with Gwen and Rebecca? Oh and of course his mother, that’s rich." She said touching Breanna on the cheek. "I love my baby, and I’ll be the first to admit I did wrong, but I deserve more that two days a week with her Chad."
"Girl he honestly believes you knew Breanna was his child all along, he thinks you simply lied to get the Crane bucks." Chad frowned. "And I can’t make him see any different."
Theresa frowned. "Do you think I deserve what has happened to me Chad?"
Chad shook his head, "No of course not girl."
"Whitney does."
"What?" Chad almost yelled. "Whit said that?"
"She said that she warned me that all my lies would come back to haunt me, but I wouldn’t listen, I don’t know maybe she’s right." Theresa calmly said.
"Theresa, come on now, you don’t believe that do you?"
"Maybe."
Chad shook his head. "You just keep holding on to that little girl, things will work out." Chad said heading to the door.
"Where you going?" Theresa asked.
"I need to go see Whit." He smiled. "I wanta talk to her about a few things."