It was a revealing episode for Julian, Eve and TC.
For Julian, oh my heart breaks for him.

If there's any wonder why Ben Masters is the best actor on Passions and one of the best around, watch yesterday's show.

It was basically him, Eve's voice in the background, a glass of alcohol and the maid, who was the sounding board.

Julian is pouring himself a glass of something and remembering his time with Eve. How she thanked him, and then kissed him on the cheek. He laments about what their lives might have been.

The maid comes into the Library, asking him what he wants to eat. He tells her that he doesn't want anything to eat. She then tells him that Alistair and Rebecca have been trying to find him, and he tells her that he'll deal with them later. He tells the maid that he lost the love of his life....again.

Another maid comes and asks about Julian's dinner plans and the first maid tells her that Julian won't be needing anything. The second maid leaves and Julian tells the first maid that once upon a time, a beautiful young thing like her would be exactly what he wanted.

I loved Julian. Quoting Robert Frost and his poem about 'The road less traveled'. Julian admits that he didn't do that. He took the regular road, and has paid for it ever since. I love the forlorn, angst-ridden Julian. Doesn't mean that he won't go back to doing 'bad things', this time just shows that he is human.

For TC, it was the best of times, and the worst of times.

There he was, apologizing to Eve for not being there during her 'miscarriage'. That he loves her and their marriage so much. You could see it in his eyes.

That was the best.

Then, TC went outside with Sam, and we were confronted with the worst.

He told Sam about Eve's 'miscarriage'. That he had almost lost it when he thought it was possible that Eve was with another man. That IF Eve had been with another man, he couldn't have handled it. That he would have killed the other guy.

This dovetails into my belief that TC couldn't handle the truth that Eve was telling him, so he had to find a way to deal with it, which was the 'miscarriage'.

The writers need to grasp that they MUST explain why a grown man is obsessed with being the ONLY man in his wife's life. What makes him like this. It's irrational. When someone feels something like this to the extreme, this is a gaping question mark in the characterization of TC.
 

Finally, for Eve...

You dig yourself in deeper by the day.

She sees Grace's marriage go down in flames, and she's doing nothing. Eve, Eve, Eve...you're going to be all alone once the truth is revealed. There is no way Grace can forgive her for this. The marriage is one thing; letting her bond with idiot savant John is a whole other issue.

So, she goes into the kitchen with Grace and they begin to talk. Grace believes she's having trouble because of something from her past, not knowing that David is a fake. Eve you should at least 'act' like you're upset about this. You're so wrong in this.

Grace then sympathizes with Eve, saying that she now knows what Eve's going through with her past with Julian and why she wants to keep it from TC.

Eve admits to Grace that she kissed Julian and Grace asked her why. Eve says that she doesn't know why..maybe because Julian, 'back from the dead' is reminding her of the Julian she once knew. She explains to Grace how TC almost found out the truth about her, Julian and their son. But, that Julian supported her throughout it all.

Grace wonders out loud to Eve, asking questions about things I've been writing for over a year.

She tells Eve that the person she was before was so wild, and so different, and then one day Eve decided to 'be' the Eve that people see now. But, how can that be? She asks Eve if it isn't possible that she wants Julian back?

Eve is appalled, she doesn't get how Grace could ask such a question. That it shouldn't be even in her thought process. She loves TC, and that's it, Eve says.

Grace continues to challenge Eve, telling her that she never worked through her relationship with Julian. And if she never worked through it, then where did the feelings go? Is it possible that they're still there?

This is NOT what Eve wants to hear. She's almost hysterical at the thought, even though, IMO, it's so true.

Eve needed serious therapy after her son died. She needed it because of all that happened to her: the loss of her family, finding love, being abandoned by Julian, being pregnant AND losing her child. And, she did it all at the age younger than Whitney. She needed therapy - she got none. She just bricked over that part of her life and proceeded to go on. It was what she needed to survive, but it wasn't emotionally healthy. I've said that Eve never dealt with her love for Julian, and the armor she had to fight it, was the hatred she carried towards Julian all those years. It protected her - from Julian, and from herself. Now, the armor is down, and the wall is coming down, and it's a great possibility that Eve is going to have to deal with all the ramifications of that part of her life - her son AND Julian, and she's totally unprepared.

I have no doubts that Eve loves TC. I really don't. I think she sees him as her protector and emotional saviour. That's how Hidden Passions portrayed their relationship. She had been emotionally dead for years until she met TC. TC gave her the family she always wanted, and his fierce possessiveness of her had to be a blanket, after having experienced the devastation of Julian's abandonment.

I believe that the desperateness of her emotional survival is what led her to lie to TC in the first place. She NEEDED him to such a degree that she would have done anything to keep him in her life. To be able to FEEL again, as she did when she met him.

I also believe that Eve is madly in love with Julian. While TC is 'safe and secure', Julian is 'wild and passionate'. There is NOTHING safe in her caring for Julian. She would be risking everything that she holds dear to care about Julian, but I don't think it's something that she can control. And, Dr. Eve Russell is ALL about control. So, you have the conflict of these two parts of Eve. Eve Russell, the respectable Doctor, has repressed the Eve that was with Julian. She pushed her down for years. But, can you really ever run from yourself?

I don't think so, but Eve doesn't want to face that. Or anything else that she's feeling.

I enjoyed yesterday's show.

SIP