*~*How Far*~* Gwen/ Ethan *Complete*
by Wildflower99



Song: Martina McBride How Far

I wrote this out of the blue.. I'm really not sure how it turned out but I did have a part two in mind with E/T that is similar...

*~*How Far~*~

There's a boat, I could sail away
There's the sky, I could catch a plane
There's a train, there's the tracks
I could leave and I could choose to not come back
Oh never come back

She had never felt more nervous in her life. Her stomach turned as she made her way to the dining room. Taking a deep breath she opened the door and saw him sitting at the table waiting on her. He was in deep thought again, not that he would ever tell her what he was thinking about. She shook her head at the sight of him and wondered what had happened to the man she loved.

“Gwen.” He spoke looking up to see her staring at him. “You look beautiful.”

Gwen smiled, “Thank you Ethan.”

“I was surprised you wanted to have dinner here tonight.” He said standing up.

“I don’t want to have dinner Ethan, I want to talk.” Gwen sighed. “I want to talk about us, our marriage, and our future.” Her eyes narrowed with the words and as she moved a strand of hair out of her face she could see he was confused.

“I don’t understand.”

Gwen shook her head, of course he didn’t understand. He wouldn’t let himself understand. It was who he was and she couldn’t take it any longer. “Do you love me Ethan?” She asked standing in front of him. She stood tall and strong and for the first time in years she felt like the woman she used to be.

“Of course I do Gwen! What kind of silly question is that?”

“Do you love me enough to make this marriage work?” She asked crossing her arms against her chest.

“Not this again.” He spoke with a frown. “Is this about Theresa?”

There you are, giving up the fight
Here I am begging you to try
Talk to me, let me in
But you just put your wall back up again
Oh when's it gonna end

“Funny that you’d bring her up so quickly.” Gwen sighed. “No Ethan, this is about us. This is about a marriage that has never been stable. I’m tired Ethan, so tired of trying to make this work when you could care less.”

“That’s not true!” Ethan spoke standing up quickly. “I love you.”

“Do you Ethan? Do you love me like you should?”

“What are you talking about? Gwen what do I have to do to prove to you that I’m committed to us?”

Gwen shrugged her shoulders, “Do you remember when we were dating? Before Harmony, before Theresa?” She asked with a hint of a smile. “Do you remember when we were the only two people in the world and our love was supposed to get us through anything? Ethan that’s the kind of love I need in my life. I realize we’re older and I know that things have changed, but our love should be stronger now, not weak and frail like it is.”

“You don’t think our love is strong?” Ethan asked clearly upset. “This is about Theresa isn’t? You think I’m in love with her!”

Gwen rolled her eyes and reminded herself that she had to stay calm. “You’ve always loved Theresa. You love us both Ethan, and that just isn’t going to work anymore. Not for me anyway, because I can’t deal with it. I can’t handle looking over my shoulder ever ten minutes wondering if Theresa is around and if you’re watching her like a teenage boy.”

“This is insane!” Ethan grumbled.

“Yes it is.” Gwen nodded. “This life that we’re leading is insane Ethan. Allowing you to have the best of both worlds is insane! Becoming a woman that I don’t know is insane!”

“Gwen after everything I’ve done you should know how much I love you.”

Gwen frowned, “Then fight for us Ethan! Fight for us by letting Theresa go.”

How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far

“I have!”

Gwen lowered her head, “You don’t even see it do you? You don’t realize that you still run to her rescue when she calls.”

“We have a child together Gwen. She will always be part of our lives.”

Gwen felt a tear trickle down her face, “No Ethan, she’s not going to be part of mine.”

“What are you trying to say to me?” Ethan asked. “Gwen what is this all about?”

“Don’t you get it Ethan? I want us to have a real marriage, the kind we talked about when we were teenagers. I want happy ever after because I deserve it! I want you to stand up in front of everyone and declare that you love me and only me and mean it! When Theresa calls you in the middle of the night because she’s having a crisis I want you to tell her to find someone else to help her!”

“But Gwen, Theresa doesn’t have anyone. I’m just trying to be good to her because of the kids.” Ethan whispered.

Gwen felt the anger brew inside of her, “Theresa could have someone Ethan! She could find a man to love her, it’s her own fault she’s alone! Stop making excuses for her. After all she’s done to us stop trying to protect her.”

“Where is all this coming from Gwen? Why are you suddenly bringing all this up?” Ethan questioned. “I thought we were past all this.”

Gwen let out a laugh, “We will never be past all this Ethan. I see that now, more than I’ve ever saw it before I see that this will never end.”

“What does that mean?”

There's a chance I could change my mind
But I won't, not till you decide
What you want, what you need
Do you even care if I stay or leave
Oh, what's it gonna be

There were no words to describe how Gwen felt at that moment. There were so many things she wanted to do, but as she saw Ethan’s eyes staring at her with the same blank look he’d had for the last six years she frowned. “I was offered a job in New York. I’ve already took it, and I leave tomorrow.”

“What?” Ethan gasped. “Gwen no.”

“You could come with me.” She offered, “We could go to New York and have a new start.”

“What about Jane?”

“I was thinking you could work something out with Theresa. She should be part of her daughter’s life. I see that now, so maybe you could work out joint custody. Then no one really looses, and we can work on adopting.”

“Gwen this is a lot to think about.” Ethan frowned.

How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far

“I’m taking the job Ethan. There’s no bending there, I’m leaving Harmony behind. I have to get out of this place, the person I’ve become here is horrible and weak and I can’t be that woman anymore.” She shrugged. “If you want to make this marriage work, if you love me enough to fight for me you’ll come with me.”

“Gwen…”

“I have to pack Ethan.”

“So what you’re just going to leave me?” Ethan asked.


Gwen frowned, “That’s up to you. I don’t expect you to come with me but I hope you decide to anyway. It’s time for me to leave here Ethan, and it’s time for you to figure out what you really want in your life.”

“When did you decide all this?” Ethan questioned through tears that had slowly started to fall.

Out of this chair, or just across the room
Halfway down the block or halfway to the moon

“I took a long hard look at my life, and what I saw was disgusting. I’ve stayed in this marriage because I love you, but the truth is I’ve allowed you to love both me and Theresa and that’s just wrong! You’ve been playing with us both, and I won’t stay here and take it any longer Ethan. I want you, everyone knows I want a life with you, but I have to leave this place behind. I have to leave so you can decide if you really want me.” Gwen whispered wiping her tears.

“Please don’t do this Gwen.”

How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say
Yeah I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far

She wiped away the last remaining tear from her eyes and walked over to the door. She stared over at Ethan and saw a man she didn’t know. He wasn’t the boy she fell in love with, nor was he the man she loved when she came to Harmony. The sparkle had faded from his eyes, and the laughter was gone from his face. He stopped being the man she loved the day Theresa Lopez-Fitzgerald walked into their lives. She had to let go for herself, and if by some miracle he decided to follow she would know that he would always be hers.

“I’m staying with Sheridan tonight.” She spoke finding strength once more. “Goodbye Ethan.” With those final words spoken she turned and left the dining room refusing to cry as the door shut behind her. Looking back once more she let out a sigh, “Goodbye Ethan.”

________________________________

I hope you enjoyed.. This is just something I want to see happen on the show.. Actually this should have happened years ago lol..
I want to see both Gwen and Theresa wise up and dump Ethan.. Let me know what ya think and if you're interested in the E/T part of this..


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