My Baby’s Gone, Chapter 17

The Russell Family therapy session continues.

“ Whitney, your father and I love you. You know that.”, Eve said.

“ Mom, this has got nothing to do with love. This has to do with smothering control. I’ve been thinking about this. I went against everything that you and Daddy had ever taught me. Everything that I knew was right. My going to California was a bad idea. I know that now. No, I knew it THEN. But, I was desperate. I felt that I was being pulled in 10 different directions. I had no job prospects. No direction. Nothing of my own. I went across the country because I couldn’t handle it. I love playing tennis, but tennis was too much for me..my passion for it was gone. Then, there’s the issue of singing. In the beginning, there was a thrill just to get up on stage, but then something happened, and I realized that it was just another thing that I could do well, but I had no real passion for it. They say that girls get involved with men just like their fathers, and I’m not different. I realize that Chad is like you Daddy. He was this overpowering presence in my life, and I couldn’t say no. I had no voice. I still have no voice. At least Simone has her own voice. I’ve always been envious of her about that.”

” YOU envious of me?”, Simone asked. “ I would have never believed it.”

” It’s true. You never had to be perfect.”

“ Princess, nobody asked you to be perfect.”

Simone snorted. “ You have GOT to be kidding. Daddy, get real. And be honest. Here and now.”

“ Your mother and I didn’t put that kind of pressure on you, Whitney.”

” Yes, you did, Daddy. Can’t you see that? Can’t you admit that. I had to be perfect. I could barely breathe.”

” Your mother and I raised you right, Whitney.”

” Daddy, I’m not saying that you and Mom were bad parents. I’m just saying that we weren’t perfect. Your daughter left not only the city and state but put as much physical distance between us without leaving the country. “

” Whitney, your father and I built a good life for you.”

Simone rolled her eyes. “ You know, this isn’t going anywhere. Whitney and I seem ready to work on the real issues of this family, but you two aren’t.” Simone turned to the therapist. “ I don’t think we need any more sessions. THEY don’t want to get real.” Simone walked over to Whitney. “ Wanna go?”

Whitney nodded and got up and left with Simone.

” Dr. Green, I don’t know what’s wrong with our daughters. I apologize.”

” Eve, there’s no reason to apologize. I happen to agree with your daughters.”

” What?”, TC barked.

” Yes. Your daughters are putting in plain English how they feel. What they are feeling, and you and Eve, Coach Russell are acting like they’re talking to you in Chinese. From their perspective, something is very wrong with your family. They’re telling you what it is. How they want to work on it, but they’ve gotten the door slammed in their face by the two of you.”

”But..”, Eve wanted to object.

” It seems as if neither one of you is very interested in the truth right now. I can’t help your family until you are.”

“ This ice cream is good.”, Simone said, as she took another lick of her cone, as they sat on a bench at the wharf.

” Yep.”

” Whitney, I want to thank you for being so honest. I know that was hard for you.”

” Simone, I’m sorry that I made you feel that way. I didn’t intend to, but I just got caught up. I felt that they expected me to be perfect, and it was easier to go along than to stand up and think for myself. I wasn’t strong like you.”

” Like me? Whitney, you’re one of the strongest people I know. You have so much confidence.”

” That’s not me. That’s the tennis. Athletics helps give you a good façade. But, you want strength, that’s you. “

” Me?”

” Sure. You don’t know how many times I’d watch you come into room, in some outfit or another that absolutely drove Mom and Dad crazy. But there you were, and you practically dared them to say anything to you. I’d look and, at first glance go,’ what was Simone thinking?’, then I’d look a few more minutes, and I’d be in awe of your creativity. Not only were they creative, but you pulled them off, and the only way you could do that was if you had a strong sense of self. And, I envied that. I envied you.”

” I never knew.”

” I guess I should have told you.”

” Whit, is it bad for me to be as mad as I am? Mom and Daddy looked at US as if we were crazy.”

” Yeah, I know.”

” I mean, what good is this therapy crap if half our family isn’t trying?”

” I know. But, I think now, we have to help one another, Simone.”

” How?”

” Well, first, I think we both have to find out what we want to do with our lives. I meant what I said about singing. Chad took that with him. And tennis – Daddy’s too wrapped up in it. “

” I don’t have a clue.”

” I disagree, Simone. I think your clues are right there. I saw the work you’ve been doing for the yearbook. It’s amazing.”

” Whitney, that’s just putting pictures together on pages and putting designs with them.”

“ Simone, you’ve always been great at anything artistic- drawing, photography, graphic design. People get PAID for all of those things. You should think about it. Seriously.”

Simone looked at Whitney. “ You knew about my interest in art?”

” WHO CARES if they think it’s a real job? Simone, it’s your life. Don’t you think it’s time that BOTH of us decided to live our lives for US?”

Simone nodded. “ Makes a lot of sense to me. Wow. A focus. I’ve never had one.”

” Simone, you’re smart as they come….You’ll kick ass.”

The sister’s high-fived it.

Just then Fox came over. “ Ladies.”

” Hi Fox.”, Whitney said.

” This is my cue to leave.”

” Simone..”

Fox sat down next to Whitney. “ Well, I see that you’ve had dessert. So, are you up for a little dancing? There’s a new salsa club in Castleton.”

” Sure.” Whitney leaned in and gave Fox a short kiss.

” Well, I like it. I REALLY like it.”