October 8, 2001

Today was hilarious. Rewind the tape hilarious.

Subject: The Friends in the Basement Are NOT Happy

The Friends in the Basement wanted Tabby and Timmy to come downstairs and see them. Tabby wondered what they wanted, considering that they were on the verge of getting what they wanted, once Charity gave up Miguel. Tabby told of the vortex, and once Timmy heard about it, he wanted him and Tabby to get out of there.

Tabby and Timmy did run, but, they only got as far as outside of the house. Timmy wanted to get to New York and then Hawaii, but, by the time Tabby finally agreed, she was unable to move. Timmy didn't understand, until he realized that he, too, was stuck.

The Friends had immobilized them, and wound up pulling Tabby and Timmy back into the house, and demanded that they come downstairs. IS this the end for T&T? Of course not, but, you know Passions.

Subject: A Mermaid, Brian? I dunno.

Liz and Doc were encouraging Brian to go and call the Cranes and tell them that he thinks he has Sheridan. Brian was hesitating, and Liz said it was because Brian thought he had found himself a mermaid, and he didn't want to ruin it.

I know Sheridan's beautiful and all, but, Brian's a grown man. He hasn't even heard Sheridan speak. Doesn't know her personality, so how could he know that she's his ideal woman? Based on looks?

Ugh.

Doc and Liz tells Brian that if she is Sheridan Crane, then she has family, AND a fiance that love her very much. Doc tells of the story of Luis going back into the hurricane for him.

Brian does call the Crane Mansion and gets Julian's lawyer, who doesn't want to give out Julian's private number, but, when Brian starts talking about going to the press with his information, he forks over the number to Brian.

Brian calls Julian, who is otherwise occupied with Eve, but finally winds up talking to Brian, who tells him that he has news about Sheridan.

I don't dislike Brian; I just find him weird.

Subject: A little Luis and Ethan bonding

Luis is still in the Hospital Chapel when Ethan comes in to talk to him. They discuss how Luis wants a miracle, and Ethan subtly tries to get Luis to face 'reality'. He knows Luis is in pain,but, they have buried Sheridan, and what Luis is asking isn't even in the category of miracle- he wants to raise the dead. Intellectually, Luis understands, but, his heart and soul haven't quite gotten there yet.

Luis asks about Ivy, and Ethan tells him about Ivy getting a sedative, because she was upset after Julian's visit. Now, this part of the conversation didn't make ANY kind of sense to me. Julian ­ a miserable SOB? Since when? Since when did Ethan NOT know all of this?

Did I imagine all the conversations when Ethan was Ethan CRANE, where he very arrogantly looked down on Julian and questioned how they could be related, because he did NOT have Julian's ways? In order for him to say things like that, he had to KNOW about Julian's ways.

Admonishing Julian because he didn't love Ivy?

Well, DUH!

That can't be a surprise, because it's been an underpinning of the Julian/Ivy relationship since the beginning of the show. Ethan only talked to Ivy about loving his 'father' Julian. He never brought up loving Ivy to Julian. He has broken up countless fights between them over the years, so, how could Julian's attitude be any kind of a surprise. Ethan grew up with Sheridan, so he knows the love that she did or did not receive at Julian and Alistair's hands.

NONE of this should be as big a 'shock' to Ethan as he made it sound like with Luis today. Total rewrite, and completely unnecessary.

Subject: A BAD Day to be Julian Crane

Pilar has just found out from Theresa that the way she found out that she was married to Julian, was by a wedding band on her finger, the morning after with Julian in her bed. Pilar is devastated, and who has the rotten luck of coming past at that moment?

Julian.

He tries to get out of there, but, he's not fast enough for Pilar, who whacks him one. Once he recovers, she totally attacks him.

I can't say this is out of character for Pilar, who has shown, on more than one occasion, that she's willing to physically attack those who hurt her children. But, she totally went off on Julian today, physically scratching him, telling him that she should scratch his eyes out. She attacks him again, and while this is happening, Eve comes by and pulls Pilar off of Julian, who runs to get away.

Eve tries to talk to Pilar, to get her to tell her what was going on. She didn't understand. She knows Julian is a pig, but, what did he do to deserve this. Pilar is quiet, and Eve goes on about Theresa being fine. That Theresa was in Harmony, safe, and that Charity's premonition obviously didn't come true, because she had asked the girls about Julian in Bermuda, and they said that things were ok.

Eve looked into Pilar's eyes, and then she flashbacked to when she, Pilar, and Grace were all discussing Charity's premonitions, and Pilar recounted the cruelty of Julian and Alistair, and how Julian would be after the maids. Eve put 2+2 together, and came up with Julian seducing Theresa. Once Theresa didn't deny it, she asked them how they could have lied to her, and Whitney said that she wanted to protect Theresa. She tells Eve that Julian got Theresa drunk, and I don't think Eve was listening to Whitney after that. She had her OWN flashback to when she and Julian first met, and he tried to ply her with champagne. Eve was furious, and left them in the hallway.

Julian was trying to clean himself up, thinking that Pilar had 'forgotten who he was'. Once Eve came into the room, Julian THOUGHT he had friendly company.

THOUGHT is the operative word.

Eve went and punched his butt to the ground.

She told Julian that he was a lowlife. The worst of the worst. How could he do that to an innocent girl like Theresa. She knows the drill. Julian got her drunk, and then got her into bed. Just like her. Theresa was a virgin, and so was she when she was with Julian. Julian says that he didn't know that, and Eve tells him that if he had ever cared for anyone outside of himself, maybe he would have.

Julian tries to defend himself by saying that he didn't do anything that a HUSBAND on his wedding night wouldn't have done. Eve is in shock, as Julian explains that he married Theresa after his divorce from Ivy. So, if it was between husband and wife, then, it's ok ­ right?

WRONG, Eve replies, and she punches him out and he lands on his butt ­ AGAIN!!

LOL!!

Eve tells Julian that he's going to be done for. And, she's going to enjoy it.

Eve takes out a handy extra SCALPEL that she has, and begins to chase Julian around the room with it. She tells him that she's going to tell Ethan and Luis how to get rid of Julian SLOW and PAINFULLY!

Julian says that they would 'fry' for it, and Eve counters that there isn't a jury anywhere that would convict them after they hear about what Julian did to Theresa. Julian tries to calm Eve down, asking if there was anything to keep them from killing him, and Eve responds ­ bring back Sheridan.

HUH?

I don't follow that logic.

Julian then gets the phonecall from Brian about Sheridan.

Pilar and Theresa are crying when Luis and Ethan find them. The men want to know what has upset them so.

TELL PILAR!!

TELL IT ALL!!

I LOVED Eva, Tracey and Ben. They were hilarious.

SIP