Collision Course, Chapter 33
 
 

Eve knocked on the door to the office.

" Come in."

" Hello Father Lonigan."

" Eve! How are you? I've wondered how things have been going."

" Fine, Father. Chad is staying with us. He knows that I'm his mother."

" I already knew that."

" Yes….well…"

" Eve, take a seat and tell me what's the matter."

Eve sat down. " Thank you, Father. I got a threatening phone call today."

" From whom?"

" Alistair Crane."

" Oh."

" He knows about Chad, and said that ' he' approved of me keeping the truth about his paternity from him."

" What did you tell him?"

" I said that I didn't care about what he thought. But, it was clear - he was threatening me."

" What did you do?"

" I hung up on him. But, then, I got scared. So…..I called Julian, and met him in the park. I told him the truth about Chad."

" Well. That must have been a very big step for you."

" It was. I hadn't thought I would tell him anything, but, I had to after the call from Alistair. I couldn't be alone in trying to protect Chad."

" What was his reaction?"

" He was shocked. I knew that. I don't really think it's hit him. I think after the shock, he thought about it in terms of solving a problem like a businessman. So, he told me that he wouldn't claim paternity."

" You think he was running away from his obligation to Chad?"

Eve shook her head. " No. It wasn't about him trying to weasel out of responsibility. He wants Chad to be safe. He can protect Chad if nobody knows who his father is. He can keep Alistair in the dark that he knows, thus not forcing any kind of a confrontation. Plus, we have our families to consider. Julian's daughter nearly died. She's recuperating. The firestorm and scandal that would result from finding out would devastate both our families. He understood that. So, he's going to keep quiet. "

" For how long?"

" The foreseeable future. He wants Chad to build a relationship with me. Of course, I don't know if that's what Chad wants."

" Eve, surely you know that he wants to get to know you."

" I don't know, Father. "

" It's too soon. Far too soon. Eve, give him time."

" You think so? That he wants a relationship with me?"

" Eve, Chad came across the country to find his parents. Now that he's found you, he will want to know you. But, it takes time. This entire situation has thrown him for a loop."

" Father…you speak as if you know this from Chad personally. Has he been to see you?"

" Yes, Eve. I agreed to talk to him. But, I can't tell you what we talk about."

Eve shakes her head. " You don't have to tell me anything, Father. Just knowing that Chad is talking to someone about all of this makes me feel good. Gives me hope that my son wants to know me. That's all I want, Father. I love him so much."

" Eve, I know that. But, you've had over twenty years to know about all of this. The emotional ties for you have been there everyday. The same can't be said for Chad. He hasn't known about this but for a few days. He doesn't think of you as his mother. He has to work up to that. Time is what he needs."

" Well, we have time."

" Yes, you do. Have you thought about telling TC and your daughters."

Eve  shakes her head. " No. Not now. I can't disrupt my family like that. I can't do it. Maybe after I've built up my relationship with Chad, I'll chance it. But, not before then. I can't take being away from my family. Breaking  up my family now that I finally have all of them isn't an option. No way."

" Alight, just so you know that your family would be better off with the truth."

" Not now, they won't. Not now."

" What about Chad? What will you tell him when he asks about his father?"

" I'm going to tell him that I'll tell him the truth some day, but that day isn't right now. It will have to do."

" Fine."

" Well, Father. I'm going to go home. I'm sure that my family is waiting for me. I have to thank you for all you've done in helping me."

" I haven't done anything."

" Me being able to talk with you freely has done me more good than you will ever know."

" God bless you, Eve. Let him guide you to make the right decisions."
 

Julian looked at the report. He couldn't focus. He didn't know why. He threw the report down and went over to the little bar that he had in his bedroom. He fixed himself a brandy and gulped it down in one swallow. Standing there, he went over the conversation that he'd had today with Eve.

Chad Harris was his son.

THEIR son.

The baby they both thought had died.

Julian tried to make himself another drink, but his hands shook too fiercely. He made his way to the edge of his bed, and let it all sink in.

His son was alive. The physical manifestation of his relationship with Eve. That he had loved her. That she had loved him. Though they had been so damaged, they had created a child. A son.

Julian closed his eyes and thought about Chad. He pictured Chad in his mind. His mind was trying to recall any and all details about Chad. Looking at his son in his mind, he wondered what part of him looked like Eve? Looked like himself?

Julian opened his eyes, and sat there, numb. What does a man do in a situation like this? When he finds out that he has a child that he thought was dead.

Like Eve, he'd had no one to help him mourn. In a way, Julian thought he didn't have the right to mourn his son. Not after the way he had disappointed Eve. Not after the way he had acted towards her when he found out about her pregnancy. If there were low points in his life, it really could be summarized by his cowardice in those days.

Julian felt waves of shame and revulsion comes over him. When Eve had told him that their son was alive, he went into autopilot. In a way, he didn't believe he had any right to be overjoyed at his son being alive. After all, wouldn't that make him a hypocrite, considering the way that he acted before? How could he feel profound joy when he didn't have a right to?

Julian thought about his father. Alistair threatening Eve to keep quiet made him furious. But, he couldn’t' risk Penny's health in all of this. He couldn't dare. He couldn't break her heart. He had already disappointed his son. Chad was an adult now. Penny was a child. He owed it to her to make sure that his mistakes of the past wouldn't be repeated.

Julian put his hand up to his face. For the first time he realized that he was crying. That tears had formed in his eyes. Once he knew that, he let them fall even more. The tears helped Julian feel it all. All the emotions about his son that he had bottled up and suppressed, because that is what Crane men did. But now, he was just a man who loved his son and was overjoyed to know that he was alive. Julian knew that for now, the only thing he could do for his son was keep his distance. His son didn't need Julian in his life. He needed unconditional love and support, which weren't two strongsuits of Julian. He had barely practiced them himself; he didn't know if he could give them to Chad. But, he could let Chad have the one person who COULD: Eve. For now, this was the best solution for everyone.